14 posts tagged “personal”

ahhh.

time to get emotional beb.

heh.

not really.

well,

seems that that stupid guy's gonna be the next hate victim,yay!

he's becoming worse by day.

lately,ive been very moody with him..haha

well,i kinda felt guilty but i think its good.

he needs this kind of treatment.

im just tired of him now.

his lame jokes didnt really bother me then,but now,it irritates m.

hehe.

well,i pity him for being like that..but i really need a wakeup call.fast..

well,its no use talking bout him.

waste my energy,you know.

humph.

thinking back now...

i realised how STUPID,really STUPID of me to act like that.

i was being irrational,stupid,naive and many more.

i cant believe i actually risked losing my friend,aizzah for that idiot.

i feel ashamed now.

ashamed on those things i did to her.

i was soo blinded then i cudnt see which was more important.

he must've felt sorry for me then.

i was soo stupid.

how on earth did i even fell for him??

he's not even my type..

allah.

well,i reckon mayb i can say,he's the only guy i'd ever like,as in really2 like.

and he was the only guy i contacted then.

god,im repeating these stuff again.

sorry.

i was soo foolished bacthen.

and god,i even believed that susu basi's words..

i almost betrayed my own friend!

well,it ended already.

and im very,very thankful that god made me realised of the situation before its too late.

im soo happy now.

and from then,i began to see..

how aizzah care bout me.

to trust me for cursing her because of that idiot..

i almost lost her..but im thankful that she put up with my unstable self back then.

hehe.

well,let bygones be bygones.

im thankful to god im back to my norm self now.

he's a stupid guy.

i dont wanna care bout him anymore.

thanks to him,my 15th birthday gonna be unforgettable.

yeah.

now.

i wish.

i really wish..

i would meet a good guy next year.

AMIIN!=]

ahh.

im soo full,i think i mite puke.

ate alot during iftar..ahh!

anyway..

i really dont have anything to say now.

about me,well its going all okay for now.

im the old lina again..im able to talk to aizzah n syazwan normally.

that means,im over it rite?

haha i hope soo.

i really do.

well,just wish him all the best.

but one problem..

ill always be looking at him in class.

not intentionally,thou.

cause he's like directly infront of me..and whenever i look infront,its him.

ut,there's no feeling,no no!

i try to stop this..but cannot lah.

just hope he wont be aware of it..

but what the heck..i think he already did.

but yah,wth.

ok soo school's been really busy now.

but today,my quran test is the last test this week!

yay!

and guess what..i got to answer all preettty good!

man,im soo glad.

but my fiqh result was no good,edd all.

when i thought,"oh,this term's topics r quite easy ah..i think i can get 70-80 for exam"..

but then,BAAMM!

it hit me like a big rock on the head..

and really,did dampened my strength to study fiqh.

well,wth.

ill just try my best.

 anyway..

apart from school works..

its been fun in class recently.

ive been friendly to the guys in class.yay!

i mean,i can say now,wan's not the only guy friend i have now.

but that doesnt mean ill forget him..

thats why im still friends with him..

cause i reckon,if he didnt start to befriend me,i dont think ill be open to the guys..

so,THANK YOU,wan.

and,there's alot of cute guys in my class lah!

what i mean by cute,is bello cute,grumpy cute,boboy cute,and just cutie cute.

not those pretty boys kinda cute.

and its just soo entertaining to watch them in class.

weehhee!

well,

im happy now.

and i wanna stay lke this for the rest of the year.

no room for tears anymore,IM FREE!

WOOhoo.

happy ramadan to all.

yah,its finally..the holy month.

today's the 6th day of it.

so how am i now?

well,i finally..YES FINALLY

managed to get myself over all those nonsense before ramadan.

and by that,i mean the whole stupid cry2 thing.

you know wat happened rad..

that day when i finally realised it..

when ive finally was obvious to it..

i managed to get myself straight and say,"OK LINA!FORGET ABOUT EVERYTHING!MOVE ON!".

and i did.

surprisingly,i did.im quite surprised myself.

but finally i did.

i was just being naive in love and he's not even MY TYPE!

god,how oblivious i was about the whole thing back then.

and now,i can say that im 100% clean=]!

no more leftover feelings.

uh uh!

and im feeling happy since then.

right now,i still am in contact with him but its all friends now.

i even made him hink tat i like ayun now.

well,i do..but its just adoring his face.

no feelings involved,seriously.

for now..

i dont wanna think about all this affair of the heart.

i just wanna enjoy this time of my life TO THE FULLEST!

just make alot of friends and be happy with them.

my mom even saud,"have as many guy friends as you like,but dont have  a bf ah".

heh.

but i think thats quite radical.

and i think im gonna follow that.

its really true when they say,love comes when youre not expecting it.

ヘロみんな~!

今日わ楽しかったよ~!!!

really had a great day today.

as usual,laughing with mustapha at wardah..and on evithing..

man,he sure loves to laugh at people!

he's one fun guy..hehe

and wardah seems to like him man..best friend baru lah nampaknyer..ほほほほほほ~!

well...

this week is really pack man..

loads of projects~!!!

and soo little time~!!!

i am soo hating this man!!!

and well,today's been going on as usual.

i thinking of him lesser n lesser now.

これわ、いいな?

maybe..

well,im okay..i guess,all these right,dont have o think about it alot2 lah.

wait i myself will be down..and i dont like tt..so for what leh?

はははは=]

rad,what you said..is it true?

well,i hope it is..

but if so,he could just atleast tell me that..

cause the way he's treating me now,i can sense hatred you know.

like hate lah...i dunno lah.

maybe i think too much..but really..

its as if i did something wrong..but its not me right?its that someone out there..

well,i dont wanna think about it anymore.

wait im gonna be the one hurt..not him..bluek.

move on lah eh.

its the past now,me&him..why cling to it?

trallalalalala~

blablabla.

i miss him.

いややややややややややややや～～～～！！！！！！！！！！

BYEBYE.

haha.

urgh.
im still irritated by that fucking nash.
seems that now,whenever i view friendster,she'd be there.
DAMN FUCKING ASSHOLE!
and yanyan's starting to be like her.
urgh!

okok.
i dont wanna be all pissed off.
im in a good mood today.
yeah~

man..
this sucks.
okok relax lin.

hmm..

i pitied mira n wali sey.

im not saing that im defending them..they did a stupid thing..but about that mongolian junx who's trying to bring up the fire about this incident..its just pure crap man.

i mean,yes,what they did was clearly wrong..going inside a cubicle toilet together,on the 10th floor?!?

i know,she was crying at that time and needed privacy to talk n cry with him..but i guess because they were too panic,toilet's the only thing which came up in their mind.

but i believe,they did not do it.

i know them..i mean,as far as their love story goes..they wouldnt do it now.its just pure stupid.

but whatever it is,they should face the consequences now.painful or not,its the truth.

she's now afraid her parents would noe about this..but she just have to endure it..there's no way to run.not when wali's parents already knew it.

i just wish her strength to endure all this lah.and ill try to help her the best way..all of us are.

soo yeah,she should noe we are always tere to back her up.

i just hope that she would atleast think about her parents feelings before doing all this..but,as what they said,"love is blind".

indeed,it is.

hero minna.

iya~!

thank god today there's school..or i might be found dead by then.

haha.stupid humour.ok shut up.

well,as expected,got sommore results today.

did fairly good in chem and bio,did oklah for nahu(lost lots of marks from those spots where i donnoe/forgot how to do.hehe)and passed my tauhid.

i think im doing ok lah.but im a bit sad for some of my friends who got bad marks for some papers.well guys,its not the end of the world.i may not know who they feel but i think they shouldnt give up lah.this is only the mid year.if we did poorly during the mid-year,there's always a chance to improve for the final-year exams,right?so dont be worried,sad or feel like giving up kay.i know talking is soo much easier than doing it itself,but we're all will help each other,right?doesnt mean you did badly for this certain subject that you can never improve..and its true what they say learn from your failures and mistakes..cause i really feel that i should do that..and those stuffs are actually good for you.yeah...so my advise to you,"kanashii kao wo yamete yo! ne,waratte misete yo!"

i think this year will be quite a challenge for some of us..but im sure,if we help each other,we can make it,ne?

yeah.

we can.

so cheer up.

ok?

5 days till the day.

iya~!

hero minna.

few weeks since i'd last posted anything.blame the exams.

but yeah,its all over already.2 days ago precisely.

how was it?

i really dont know the exact answer for that.cause,when i was doing all those papers,i really felt no self-confidence.i was afraid of getting the answers wrong..even if i really felt the questions was quite easy.truthly speaking,i was not happy doing all those.i dont know.this year's exam just doesnt feel soo right.i studied hard for it,thats for sure.i had bad headaches for the 1st week,maybe a sign of stress?or over studying?well,i cant say that's stress..cause i know,stress is much more bigger than that.but during that time,when i was siting in the exam room,answering those questions..i always felt scared..that i might done everything wrong.there are some papers which i can say were quite hard and there's some which i can say were easy.

but when it ended that tuesday morning,i felt as if a weight has been lifted off my shoulders..i felt relieved.

but,by now,most of my teachers have finished marking the papers.and yeah,there's giving the marks out.like today.

the 1st paper was arabic language.i did quite a good job for the paper1.it was quite a surprise for ive always get bottomline marks,so i can say that im quite happy with it.the paper 2,well,i failed.not badly..but frankly,it kinda hurts when i first saw it.but i wont be sad about it cause its due to my carelessness that i failed.i failed due to those questions whihc i didnt do or didnt study for it.and i know,i have only myself to blame,but im okay with that.

next was Qur'an.for the C.A,i dont think i did a good job.well,the tests was quite a dissapointing experience.i  didnt get good marks for the tests.not that i didnt memorise,i memorised it pretty good.its just that i got nervous and everything was forgotten..and plus,im new to this teacher and she's really not a helping person.i mean,i didnt entirely forgot the verses,i just got mixed up with the ending of the verses..and she just wont help us remmembering it.she wont even give clues for it.my past teachers was kind enough to do that.but,for the clas memorising,i think i did quite a good job.cause i finished all of the pages.but,the oral exam was just like the previous tests.and making the matter worst was that my teacher was really in a bad mood during the exams..and so she became even more unreasonable and didnt help a bit.frankly,i just wanna cry when i entered my class back.i thought,"well,i didnt do good for the tests..so im gonna try hard for the exam"..and i did!i memorised everything!but...it wasnt just good enough.truthly speaking,i was heartbroken.but it has already happened,and there's no use crying over spilled milk.

next was faraid.well,when i first saw the paper again,frankly,i was quite sad for i didnt get 40+ marks,considering the paper was quite easy for me.but i did passed.and i guess im happy for that.well,i figured out its no use getting sad at the first place,im not a genius person and not getting 40+ was normal,right?well,i hope its true.i should be happy that at least,i passed!yeah,i should be happy!!!

and next was ulum qur'an.this one,im happy for what i got.and i think im gonna get quite a good grade for this.but i wont be expecting an A like those clever kids.but yeah,im happy.

and next was fiqh.the heartbroken one.seriously and frankly speaking,i think i should get a better mark for it.well,i didnt expect to get 90+ for there's this one part where i didnt study for it and so i'd expect to get a zero,but i got one,which is good.okay back to the whole point.i know,passing was like,good.at least,i passed,right?but i didnt expect the 60+ marks.i thought,even if its 70,i think im happy.but 60+ is like,very near to failing.i know,all these seems like greed,but thats just what i felt when i first saw it.and i really think my teacher was a little unresonable at marking some parts.for such small mistakes,she minus 1 whole mark.i mean,that kind of mistakes is worth like,0.5 mark.and taht really dissapoint me.but i know i should be happy that i passed.and yeah,i should be happy.but i know,ill be expecting a rather ok grade for it,and maybe a D at worst.

maybe the reason for all the pathetic and unreasonable feeling,was actually because i just realised my grades are dropping.well,im aware of that but seeing with your own eyes really was a shock.you know,those feelings when you know you'll be expecting it but deep down inside,you're hoping that all those are just thoughts and never gonna happen,but when it does happened,it felt like a huge rock being thrown to you.and out of fear that some of my friends are catching up with me.ok,i really dont want to have that feeling,at all.its pure greedy and selfish.but,im just like any other human who really cant control their feelings at times.but,dont worry.ill get rid of that feeling,thats for sure.cause my top priority for school now is just to get good grades so that i can reach pre-U and finally take my 'O' level exam.and yeah,to work really hard for my academics to prepare for the "O"s.and fighting for a place in class isnt my priority and i should'nt be feeling this.so yeah,must be happy for those who are doing good.

and also,some people failed their papers and from this,i can see that i should be atleast thankful to god that i passed.yeah,i should be happy.

and i wish we all are gonna pass.yeah,i really hope so.

hero minna.

today's labour day!so its holiday man~!

well,today i woke up with no voice.my throat pain from few days ago..thought ignorance is a bliss..so i ignore lah.then huge shock today when woke up,cannot talk.iyaa~!today clinics all close so cannot go doctor..nyeah.

hmm..

few days to go till the exam starts..

but i just cant get myself to study.everytime i open my book..ill be sleepy in few minutes time or there's just something there that will distract me from concentrating.my mind will go,"ala..this one can study the dy before the exam lah..no memorising what..can lah..can lah.." with every book i tried to read.well i reckon its because all the tedious subjects are no more there..i've post about this once.still cant believe im still relaxing when my exams are soo near.

but hey..this isnt nothing surprising.

cause i remmber,last year during my final yr exams,i bought Gong drama dvd(24 episodes) and watched it in 3 nights straight!and during the mid yr one,i think i was watching hana yori dango..haha^_^"

god.

my tuk alang just passed away.

ina lillahi wa ina ilaihi raajiun.

finally,after months of suffering..may god bless his soul.amin.

i wasnt that close with him but i remembered him as a good man.he really loves his grandchildren.

i hope everyone there in malaysia will be okay.